Most parents can tell you whether their child is reading on grade level. Fewer can say what their child does in the first thirty seconds after getting stuck. Do they reread the question? Look at an example? Ask the classmate next to them? Or do they put their pencil down and wait?
That small moment says a lot about whether a school is building independent learners. If you're comparing private elementary school options in Los Angeles, it's worth looking past academics alone and asking how a school teaches children to manage their own learning.
Children aren't born knowing what to do when they're confused. Some classrooms leave it to chance. Others teach it directly, with a short list of things to try before asking an adult: reread the directions, check the posted example, ask a neighbor. Over time, children who practice those steps tend to need less rescuing and feel more confident trying hard problems. Ask a school what students are taught to do when they get stuck, and whether teachers can show you how it's practiced in class.
Independence grows when children get to make real decisions, even small ones. Choosing which book to read during free reading. Picking a topic for a short report. Deciding which of two assignments to start first. Each choice gives a child practice weighing options and living with the result. Ask where students get to choose during a normal week, and how teachers guide those choices without making them for the child.
Children also grow more independent when they can talk about their own learning. A child who can say "I'm working on finding the main idea" or "I always rush the last step" is starting to manage their progress, rather than waiting for a grade to tell them how it went. Some schools build this in on purpose. At Valley School, the Portrait of a Cougar names "Goal-Oriented, Self-Directed Learners" as one of the traits it aims to develop in students. Ask how teachers help children set and check small goals, and how often students reflect on their own work.
There's a balance here, and schools don't always strike it. A seven-year-old handed a long-term assignment with no check-ins usually ends up feeling behind, not responsible. The strongest elementary classrooms give children real ownership in small steps, with an adult close enough to catch them when a plan falls apart. If a school describes its approach only as "we let kids figure it out," it's fair to ask what support sits underneath that.
Look at what homework asks your child to do. Is it mostly a worksheet to finish, or does it sometimes ask children to plan, choose, or explain? Ask, too, how teachers want parents to help. Some schools prefer that parents step back and let mistakes come to class, where teachers can see them. Others want parents closely involved every night. Neither is wrong, but you'll want to know which you're signing up for, because it shapes your evenings for years.
The habits a school builds should show up in small ways around the house too. A child who is learning to manage their work may start packing their own folder, remembering a library book without a reminder, or telling you about a plan for a project. Progress is uneven, and that's normal. Still, if months go by and nothing seems to transfer home, it's a good question to raise with a teacher.
At Valley School, our elementary program is designed to help children develop confidence, independence, and strong collaboration skills as they grow. Explore our Elementary School Curriculum Guide to see what each grade covers, then set up a visit to watch our students at work.
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